Proverbs 15, Summer Psal. Proverbs are back for a limited time, and we are ready to jump right in with this Book of Proverbs, looking at how our relationship to Jesus transforms conflict in our other relationships. As we look to the reading of God’s word, if you please join with me in prayer. Oh God, we do ask that you would guide us by your word and spirit, that in your light we may see the light of your truth, and there find the true freedom and liberty of the good news of Jesus, that you would transform our hearts by your truth, that our words would adorn our savior, for it’s in his name that we do pray. Amen. Proverbs 15: 1-2. A soft dancer turns away rath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouth of fools pour out folly. The word of the Lord. Thanks be to God. The Book of James tells us that the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God, and it does not. We all recognize that. But words of wisdom do. Words of life, words intended to promote peace and righteousness.
Living wisely in the Bible is not about being able to fathom the mysteries of God and his inscrutable will. It’s about conforming our lives to his revealed standard. Repeatedly in Proverbs, we are told that being a hot-tempered person who’s easily angered is both foolish and it does not conform to God’s wisdom. Again, we know that. We see that in our lives and lives of others. We have this crazy, fictional representation of that. If you think of the incredible Hulk, it’s the living epitome of that type of anger, stress and anger. Stress and anger, and he blows up and it’s just Hulk, smashed, Smoke, Smash, everything. The problem is it’s not really that fictional because we know in moments of conflict, there is this inner Hulk that’s right below the surface in our own hearts and lives that’s just ready to well up at any moment. It’s in those moments of conflict how hard it is to speak well, to reflect the wisdom of God. Emotional restraint and self-control, they’re a part of being a disciple of Jesus, who himself, as Paul tells us, is the wisdom of God. Foolishness and unrestrained emotions destroy our relationships.
It brings destruction to our society. The anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God. The Lord calls his people to bring forth good words from a changed heart. We must strive then to bring his His words of life to those around us. Proverbs presents us with a picture of what that should look like and what it should not look like. We see the ruin that a heart inflamed by sin can bring, and we also shown how Christ informs our conflict. Well, looking first then at a heart inflamed by sin, Jesus gives us a very straightforward picture here. In Luke 6, he very clearly says, The good person out of the good treasure of his heart, produces good. The evil person, out of his evil treasure, produces evil. Then he succinctly brings it all together. For out of the abundance of the heart, his mouth speaks. Jesus has said similar things like that as well. It’s out of the heart flow our words. Out of our heart we speak. And it, of course, is a heart issue. Our raton attitude, our anger, it comes out of sinful hearts. And in that, we must take responsibility for Because when we’re upset in a conflict, we say things like, he made me so mad.
Well, she pushed my buttons or triggered me. Well, he knows how upset I can get. Notice that those are all passive statements, meaning that this was done to me. I was just minding my own business, going along without a thought in the world that this person came up and made me angry. Their fault. No, God’s wisdom tells us we need to own our own hearts and we need a war against the sin in our soul. Both of those things are realities for Jesus’s people. Well, how do we do that? Verse 1 of 15. A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. That word for anger and wrath, they’re virtually synonyms. In Hebrew, the word for anger is an expression. It’s an idiom. It literally can translate something like the breathing or the rising of the nostrils. It’s opposite. It’s strange to us as well. When scripture speaks of God being slow to anger, literally it’s saying he’s long of nose. The $10 word for that is physionomy. The reason I bring that up, it just simply means face reading, because that’s what Hebrew words describe. They describe face reading. If you look them up in a dictionary or a larger Bible, you see that and think, That’s odd.
It’s not when you think about it. Because when we’re angry, we reflect that in our face. A person who is patient has a relaxed face. Someone who is impatient is short of breath. And that’s the words they use in Hebrew to describe that. In English, we have a similar idioms that we use for that as well. We can speak of someone with a long fuse or a short fuse. And we mean by that, of course, it’s like a stick of dynamite. They got a short fuse, they blow up quickly. Well, the Hebrew reflects that in their language as well. What you see on the face, like an angry bull and it’s the nostrils are flaring. That’s what it is. We feel the heat rising up in us. That word for ‘rath’ is about heat and glowing embers. It makes our internal temperature go up. And in the midst of that, before, a soft answer, a gentle, a tender answer. The idea This is someone who speaks in kindness, who’s self-controlled in their words, who’s not provoked, nor are they trying to provoke. The person will keep a situation from escalating into fury. But a harsh word, a painful word escalates, stirs up, heats up.
And we know exactly how this works. It also includes the how something is said. You know those situations where technically You didn’t say anything bad, but the how you said it was really bad. What are you getting all mad about? All I said was whenever you have that sentence, all I said was you’re in the wrong. Just know that. We start in a very juvenile way as children in a home, and you might say something to a sibling like, Oh, that dress is pretty. And they go away crying to mom or and you go, I told her it was pretty. We get more sophisticated at that as we get older. It’s still the same. That heart of an eight-year-old isn’t much different from a heart of a 50-year-old. We just entered into plausible deniability. And that should not be a part of God’s people. We don’t let our very perfumed words get stunk up with a skunky heart and a tone how we said something, because tone is communication as well. Both of those things we recognize. Tone as a form of speech, just as much as words. We also recognize that when you’re upset, you often hear tone wrong.
We just don’t hear it as well when we’re already upset. It’s hard enough when someone’s talking in front of you, but how much more difficult when you get a text or an email that somebody sends and how easy it is to be inflamed by that. You get this message Rather than responding back in light terms, quickly, all caps, consider calling the person, arranging a time date together. How many arguments can be solved? How much conflict can go away simply by a face to face rather than just sending it back and forth. But what do we do when we are shot with a flaming arrow? And we know it’s intentional. What then? Take a moment. Allow the Holy spirit to bring to us a calm inner response. Bringing this person in these circumstances, maybe to a quick word of prayer to the Lord. Sometimes one writer wrote, he reminds us that some people respond angerly or defensively no matter what. And situations like this, it’s just best to respond with nothing. There are some situations where the person is going to tip over regardless. Silence is a good option. Proverbs 26: 4, Don’t answer a fool according to his foolishness.
Remaining silent when you want to lash back is a wonderful exercise of self-control. Peter writes in 1 Peter 2, he said, When Jesus was reviled, he did not revile in return, but when he suffered, he did not threaten. He continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly. When we refuse to take debate, when we refuse to respond, he can remain silent in those moments, we are walking in the way of Jesus, not reviling for reviling. Charles Bridges, he was a well-known 19th century pastor. Speaking on these verses, he said, Alas, man’s natural propensity is to feed rather than to quench angry flames. We yield to irritation. We insist on the last word. Pride and passion on both sides strike together like two flints. We see that very vivid word picture, these flints striking together, causing this combustion to take place. That’s why we’re told to yield to the Holy spirit. We walk in step with God’s spirit. Galatians 5. 1 Corinthians 13, a beautiful passage on love. One of the attributes, Love is not easily provoked. Not easily provoked. And therefore careful not to provoke a chaf or wounded heart. A gentle word in return for the arrows that were flung at you.
And it takes us into verse 2. The tongue of the wise commends knowledge with the mouth of fools, pour out folly. To commend something, again, that word, it carries the idea of adorning or beautifying. Another way you could translate that to be the tongue of the wise adorns knowledge. The mouth of foules bubble forth with stupidity. That idea of bubbling, gushing of words coming up. It’s not about speaking too much or too little. It’s about whether your speech is considered or unconsidered. There’s a wonderful adornment, a right used to wise and well-spoken words. Righteous seeks to promote peace. It seeks the good of the other. Your words are either going to be a soothing softening ointment on a wound, or it’s going to be gas on a fire. Your words will have effect. What is the effect that you want? And there we recognize our hearts are inflamed with our pride. We want control. We desire to take up our cause. We desire to defend our own rights. An utter refusal to yield, lest I lose. Maybe I just want to be above everybody else. And there’s a moment in the conversation, a moment where we have an opportunity to love as we have been loved by Jesus.
Where we take what we have received and we give it to others. And you know what I’m talking about? There’s that turning point in the conversation, that pivotal moment when you’re either going to seek peace or you’re going to defend yourself and get your licks in. The moment when you use clever wit to cut somebody down to size or you will give in, yielding, rather than blow for blow. Because in Jesus, we have received a gentle answer. We’ve received his tenderness rather than wrath. God’s wrath is righteous wrath, is holy, Righteous anger. Jesus receives the blow that we deserve, and he has given kindness in return. Pastor John Newton, author of Amazing Grace, he said, A man truly illumened will no more despise others than blind Bartimaeus, after his eyes were open, would take up a stick and beat every blind man he saw. How often that is the case? Where we take up our stick and start whacking others with our words for doing the very same things that we do or did apart from Christ. How easy that is. There is no Patience or humility when we’re saying, I’m right, you’re wrong. Truth hurts, get over it.
Where does that attitude come from? It comes from a deep place within our heart that we’ll think true significance and importance is only there if I’m standing up on top of somebody else beneath me. But Jesus comes in just the opposite. He says, go to the bottom of the pile. Go to the bottom of the pile, because that is where you’ll find me. Now, to be sure, all people understand a gentle word turns away anger. Everybody knows this. This is not complicated stuff. God’s wisdom is offered to everyone, and there’s common grace. But you cannot have God’s wisdom apart and isolated from God himself. At a minimum, it’s helpful, it works. But ours is a covenant God who has said to us, You are my people, I am your God. Do this because I live in you and you are to be a holy and righteous people because I am a holy and righteous God. That’s speaking of a full transformation of who we are and what God intends us to be. That we would reflect his image to his glory. That transformation that is available to us in Christ. And because of that, we then take Christ into our conflict.
He informs our conflict. This is from John Newton again. He wrote a letter to a friend on the topic of controversy. And I It’s been a long time, but I’ve read it before. And this is what he wrote to this person. He said, As to your opponent, before you set pen to paper against him or typing it out, be I’m going to send it through your phone, before you communicate in some way to this person, Commend him by earnest prayer to the Lord’s teaching and blessing. This will move your heart to love and pity him. If he’s a believer. The Lord loves him and bears with him. Therefore, you must not despice him or treat him harshly, for the Lord bears with you. In a little while, you will meet in heaven. He will then be dear to you. Then the nearest friend that you have upon earth is to you now. And if he’s an unconverted person, he’s more a proper object of your compassion rather than your anger. Alas, he does not know what he does. But you know who has made you to differ? You are blind by nature. Do not hate him because the Lord has been pleased to open your eyes and not his.
We should immediately recognize a sinner doesn’t change his heart. A man dead in his sins can’t make himself alive or soften his own heart. We know that. Our part is not to strive, but in meekness to instruct those who oppose us. If you really want to be an instrument of correction, you will be cautious in laying stumbling blocks in front of the blind. This fits really well with what Paul instructs us that our warfare is not against flesh and blood, but against the evil powers of this dark age. In Newton, he ends with this thought. He said, What will a prophet of man if he gains his cause and silences his adversary, if at the same time, he loses that humble and tender frame of spirit, which the Lord delights in and in which the promise of his presence is made. If you have been ill-treated or wounded by another, then you have the opportunity to show that you are a disciple of Jesus. If your goal is to show how bright you are, to make others laugh at your opponent, that’s easy. But if you are seeking, because you belong to Jesus, you’re seeking the task that is given to you, it is then to glorify him.
The task is God’s glory. We are to have a genuine compassion on the souls of others as we stand firm on the truth. For this great task, we need to go forth in the strength of the Lord Almighty, speaking the truth and love. What then are we to do with a rebellious and disbelieving heart which hates the yield to anyone? In your bulletin, I put this quote from William Kirkpatrick. It’s just a great reminder, wonderful summary. One way to handle the discrepancy between our beliefs and our sinful inclination is to repent, pray for grace and forgiveness, struggle on in belief that God will forge a greater harmony for us in our battle with sin. That is the Christian approach. The Bible’s response to God’s covenant people has always been repentance. Repentance to God, repentance to one another. And responding with gentle words says to the world, Christ reigns in my life. I belong to him, and I will not bring dishonor to the Lord of glory by my words. I want them to adorn wisdom because he is the wisdom of God. Peter writes, 1 Peter 3, ‘Find me all of you have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, a humble mind.
Do not repay evil for evil, reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless. ‘ ‘For to this you were called that you may obtain a blessing. ‘ That we were called to bless. Think of that as an incredible gift that we have. We have been blessed with the ability to bless. And that is a gift given to those who belong to Christ. And so what that means. What that means What that means is in our conflict, in our conflict with one another, husbands and wives, brothers and sisters, coworkers, the person who won’t turn right on red, all those other people in our lives, those people out there on the Internet who are wrong, that we must correct or think we need to. All of is we take the first step towards that person. We don’t have to wait for them to make things right. We take the first step because Jesus has already taken it for us. He has already stepped towards us. He has embraced us. And therefore, we are now free to move towards towards those who have hurt us, those who have wronged us. At times, it may be simply, yes, I’m going to remain silent because Paul says, be at peace with all people as far as as possible with you.
Not everybody wants to be at peace with you. Sometimes maybe that is just a moment of silence and not fanning the flames. But where you can be a man or a woman of peace so that you adorn the beauty and the knowledge of God’s wisdom, that’s what we’re to do. And as I said before, this is not done. The sounds and the noise It’s everywhere around us. It doesn’t do this. It doesn’t tell you to step towards a person. It says to step towards them with a right hook coming in. Hit them hard, hit them fast, hit them continuously. Don’t let them have a moment. That’s the world. It’s terrible. We don’t want to reflect that. We want to adorn the words of Jesus, the man of peace, the man of sorrows, that he would receive the reward of the suffering in the lives of his people, that we could eat whatever is given to us because of our love for him as his covenant people. That’s the and glorious price of our calling in him. We see that, and we know in those moments, you know that when that conflict comes and you’re right there at that Lynch pin, which way are you going to go?
Call out to God. That he would enable us to step forward as men and women of peace. Words aptly fitted and spoken. Because that, brothers and sisters, is the word made flesh to you and I who has dwelt among us. The kind words of Jesus have dwelt and tabernacled with humans. And he has died for sinners that we would have life in him. And we get to reflect that as his people. To his praise and his glory and his grace, pray with Father, as we come before you, we all need to confess. Anybody has done this for more than 10 minutes, Lord, this is hard. This is difficult. And we ask your forgiveness. We do not do this well. We do not suffer reproach and reviling, as you have called us to. But, Father, we pray that you would continue to change us, to mold us, to shape us into the image of our savior Jesus. Father, that you would continue to bring through us restorative words, that Jesus would be exaltet. We pray and ask this all in his mighty name. Amen.
Discaimer: This sermon text was generated by an automated transcription service.